June 15, 2006

Save the Polar Bears! Get a Vasectomy!

You know, I wanted to blog about the recommendation of the UC-Boulder panel to boot Ward Churchill, but it seems that lately I can't throw a rock without hitting some new salvo in the mommy/baby/breeder/childfree/THE APOCALYPSE IS UPON US wars.

Dang, people, what the hell is going on?

Here's the latest, about a childfree chick who changed her mind and was frankly ambivalent about it right up until she expelled a wrinkly new human from betwixt her nethers. She's also an advice columnist, and made the mistake of giving advice.

Read the article, but that's not the fun part. Read the comments--I found them extremely informative!

Did you know that vasectomies are really the only way we'll stop the polar ice caps from melting? So step on up and take one in the gonads for our furry polar bear bretheren, men!

Did you know that children serve no useful function to the parents? And that comes from someone with children! I can only reply that he or she has not yet discovered the beauties of child labor law exceptions within the home...

Did you know that when a woman asks for (and receives) advice from an advice columnist, it automatically makes the columnist a judgemental hypocrite?

Did you know that the only people who are really concerned with perpetuating the species are the ones who AREN'T perpetuating the species? That, my friends, is a really neat trick.

Oh, and religion--but not all religion, only Christianity--is evil. But we already knew that, so let's move on.

No matter what side you're on, this forum has something for you: it's a cornucopia of fuzzy thinking, judgemental idiocy and serious environmental/population control misinformation--basically, a fun way to kill a few minutes if your Thursday gets slow.

Full disclosure: I don't care whether or not you want kids or have them; as long as I don't have to raise the results you can do with your ovaries and sperm as you will. Have a nice life and all that crap. Love, Big Arm Woman

Posted by Big Arm Woman at June 15, 2006 11:31 AM

I don't know whether to laugh, cry, or move to a cabin in the woods where I have no contact with my fellow humans ever again.

Seriously - were we this screwed up before the internet and it was just that nobody knew it? Or have there been some kind of contention-generating-fret-causing-rays coming from Jupiter or somewhere in the last dozen years?

Posted by: ricki at June 15, 2006 12:07 PM

The beauty of instant worldwide communication is that it allows us to Instantly Judge Everyone Else All The Time And Shoot Our Mouths Off About It!!!!! And then you can join a community of like-minded folks and spend all your time being righteous about yourselves.

Man, I just came to the internet for the fan fiction about Buffy the Vampire Slayer...what the hell happened?

Whatever happened to MYOB? That's mind your own business, to the acronymically challenged.

Posted by: BAW at June 15, 2006 12:13 PM

Q: "What should she tell friends and family members who were asking when they were going to have kids?"

A: "We're not sure yet but we're having fun practicing."

Shuts them up every time.

Posted by: Locomotive Breath at June 16, 2006 09:53 AM

You've got to love the commenter that compared the advice columnist to Osama bin Laden. You know, genocidal fundie freak, childless couples. The similarities are glaring.

Posted by: Emily at June 16, 2006 10:17 AM

I was wondering if you had seen that! I ran across it yesterday and was going to email you but with the eye rolls and head shaking I was going through, I didn't feel like I should subject you to it.

Seriously, what the hell is wrong with people? I mean, good on you that you aren't having kids and good on you because you are. I don't care either way, frankly. I'd just like everyone to shut the hell up about it. I don't need a group consensus to justify the choices I make in life, thanks.

Posted by: Feral Girl at June 16, 2006 12:30 PM

The "happily [and annoyingly] childfree" are reprehensible idiots, and must be told so. So I do. I also tell them that their cats and/or dogs are ugly. It doesn't make me as happy as my children do, but it's not bad. ;-)

Posted by: Michael at June 17, 2006 12:44 AM