April 06, 2006

Wow. Guess I Really Hated that Movie.

The good news - we have two fully functional toilets, hot water (not in the toilets) and a heat pump that actually, you know, puts out heat. Let the wackiness ensue!

The bad news - I need reading glasses, and Hublet and I watched The Wedding Crashers last night, which left me feeling rather homicidal. WHY was this movie popular? It wasn't just tasteless in that affected, "oh, we're such non-PC scamps" way, and it wasn't just predictable in the "boy meets girl under false pretenses, boy decides to come clean only to be superceded by girl's butthead boyfriend, boy wins girl at the end" way, it was also BORING. And badly written! Not even the creepily mesmeric effect of Owen Wilson's nose could keep my attention.

News flash, script folk! Giving your characters a distinctive "patter" does not translate into forcing them to recite self-congratulatory, profane, stream of consciousness soliloquies for Every Single Line They Utter, while the plot--what, there was a plot?--languishes pitifully forgotten in the corner. Creating characters who exist solely to make the writers look clever doesn't translate into interesting films. Or books. Or even party conversations. Here's a ladder, writers--get over yourselves.

And also, Will Farrell? Not that funny. So the scene with him? Could have easily been about a year and a half shorter. Ditto the crazy younger brother's scenes, Jane Seymour's boob scene, anything involving the fiance, the pasttimes of the wacky rich and powerful, and the endless montage of wild and crazy wedding crashing, replete with Implants A'Flappin'. And that's taking into consideration the fact that Hublet and I skimmed the second half of the movie on Fast Forward. Too long. Too, too long.

Wow, that's pretty much the whole movie, isn't it? They probably could have shortened this thing by an hour and a half with no problem. Come to think of it, wasn't this an episode of Three's Company?

I want my two hours back--and a written apology.

Posted by Big Arm Woman at April 6, 2006 02:04 PM

I agree. I'm sure I would have found this movie funny if I were still 18. To find this movie funny would be worth it to turn the clock back 30 years.

Posted by: Locomotive Breath at April 7, 2006 10:58 AM

Seriously, that's why Hellbilly and I skipped this and went to see The 40 Year Old Virgin instead. That was actually a funny movie.

Posted by: Feral Girl at April 7, 2006 11:15 AM

Another movie to file under this same category would be 50 First Dates. Just....bad. Ugh.

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Posted by: Braden at April 15, 2006 03:36 AM