May 27, 2005

If it's Memorial Day

It must be time for the hell dog's annual gastrointestinal meltdown.

Regular readers will recall that this time last year hell dog decided to devour one pound of uncooked bacon, with predictably hilarious results which culminated in $350 to the veterinarian for treatment of severe pancreatitis.

Yesterday when I arrived home after purchasing a rockin' pair of Spiderman roller skates chez Target for The Boy I noticed that the dog wasn't eating. As she normally devours everything that holds still long enough, I realized that something was off. She was quiet the rest of the evening, as well.

So before bed last night I leaned down and listened to her tummy. SOMETHING is definitely going on. So I dosed her with Pepto and sent her to bed. Hublet is under strict orders to keep an eye on her.

I'm more curious as to what, exactly, she ate this time. I think she's finding carrrion or equally scary stuff in the woods behind the house, because she recently came back inside after an outdoor jaunt and threw up beetles. Yep, beetles. As in black six-legged thingies with hard carapaces. Either she's possessed by the devil and that's a standard side effect, or she's finding "food" that just isn't what normal non-beetle creatures consider edible and eating it anyway.

After the deer leg incident, I'm going to go with the demonic possession theory. It's easier.

Posted by Big Arm Woman at May 27, 2005 08:27 AM

She seems to be fully recovered this morning - whining for food and barking at everything.

Oh, did I mention I'm off for the summer?

Posted by: Husband of BAW at May 27, 2005 10:53 AM

The Morningstar soy Bacon Strips are pretty good (if not overnuked! they're death if overnuked) but my Doberman won't touch them, apparently a dog-proof bacon substitute.

It's probably simpler to train the dog though. For this, the Snappy Trainer is easy and automatic get a couple of 3-packs.

My Doberman won't touch her favorite food even if right on the top of the garbage pail, the garbage pail being, like counter tops, a sacred area.

Won't help with deer legs. That can be done with more effort and an electric fence charger, however, as part of general poison-proofing (``all outdoor food will give you a hell of a shock.'')

Posted by: Ron Hardin at May 27, 2005 01:03 PM

Let's hope Spunky the Wonder Pom has decent luck with his last night's snack of the gel casing from a cpap mask and handful of duct tape. Trade ya for a yakful of beetles...

Posted by: Sally at May 27, 2005 04:54 PM

...and why do dogs insist upon eating cat nuggets out of the litter box?

I mean, sure, they look like Almond Rocas (without the gold foil wrappers), but really, they can't taste good to dogs, can they?

Are there vitamins in there that dogs lack?

Cat vomit, too. When little fluffy pukes up a big, juicy, hairball on the living room rug, the dogs are right there lapping up that mess.

Geez', I'm getting sick to my stomach just writing this disgusting post...

Posted by: snopercod at May 27, 2005 10:03 PM

Ever read about dogs in elk?

I just died laughing at that one.


Posted by: Wince and Nod at June 1, 2005 07:14 PM