December 12, 2004

Sounds of the Season

Well, it's been quite a week. I do apologize for the lack o' content, but things are settling in now, so life is back to normal--or at least as normal as it gets for me.

I've noticed a shocking dearth of Christmas Cheer around these parts, and so I will now do my part to remedy that situation by bringing you my own special Christmas Album!

Yes, straight from the heartland of Johnston County, it's a Big Arm Christmas, featuring such never-before heard favorites as:

Walking in a NASCAR Wonderland

It's Beginning to Smell a lot Like Deer Parts

Deck the Halls with Toddler Tantrums

The Twelve Disasters of Christmas

Frosty the Six Foot Inflatable Yard Art

I Saw Mommy Decking Santa Claus (over the Christmas Credit Card Bill)

And the original hit, "Screw you, Martha Stewart! I LIKE Canned Cranberry Sauce!"

Well I do, damn my unsophisticated palate.

Posted by Big Arm Woman at December 12, 2004 09:35 PM
Comments

My mother lovingly roasts a huge turkey for the holidays. She bakes a ham, cooks a huge pot of collards, makes creamed potatoes with butter and sour cream, stirs up the most wonderful gravy, bakes several cakes and pies and other sweets. She makes a large pan of oyster dressing as well as a couple of pans of biscuits. The last thing to come to the table is the platter of cranberry sauce. We only have it at Thanksgiving and it's always canned. PS - We put the cans in the fridge cause we like ours chilled.

Posted by: middleagedhousewife at December 13, 2004 01:01 PM

Yeah, but have you noticed how OceanSpray has changed the cans the last couple of years?

The proper way to open a can of jellied cranberry sauce is to 1) remove the tope of the can, 2) open about 1/3 to 1/2 of the bottom of the can, and 3) shake the whole, chilled lump of cranberry sauce into a serving dish, 4) cut into slices with a knife, and serve.

But these stupid new cans have bottoms with no lip, so you can't use a can opener on them to break the vacuum seal (because the solid jellied sauce won't come out otherwise). Of course, you could always scoop it out, or cut it down one side so you could get air in. But that'd spoil the whole appearance of the thing - after all, there's an art to getting it out in one, beautiful, smooth, er.. cylinder. Thanksgiving and Christmas tradition and all that.

Durn burn you, Ocean Spray!

Posted by: Claire at December 13, 2004 02:14 PM

I did notice that too about Ocean Spray. So, what I did on Thanksgiving was to use an old fashioned pointy can opener for the other end(like you'd use to open up Hi-C). The can doesn't have a lip to leverage on, but if you apply enough pressure it can be done. Try it. And, if it won't come loose from shaking it you can always blow hard in the bottom of the can. Do this when serving immediate family only (or if no one is watching).

I too am a canned cranberry sauce gal. And it can't have those damned real cranberries in it either. Ruins everything!

Posted by: Christine at December 13, 2004 04:32 PM